19 October 2010

Not Feeling Positive

I have been feeling a little blue for 2 weeks now. I cannot understand why. I think (and slightly feel) that I may be entering the "passage" or "menopausal" stage. 

I have always been an "irregular" person. Sometimes I will not have period for 3 months in a row but I have ceased menstruating for some time now. I already saw a doctor and said I was still not into menopausal. However, 2 years ago, I started feeling hot flushes and would fan myself incessantly even if the aircon unit was in full blast and on the lowest temperature.

I cannot take any hormonal pills due to my hypertension so I have to really lose weight to see if my period will come back.

I am also emotional lately and very quick to get irate. I am normally a docile person but this is really different. I am always perky and see the "glass half full." Lately, that is not the case. I just feel gloomy and lacking enthusiasm in most of the things I do. The only thing that excite me at the moment is our family's vacation trip because I really need to change my scenery or I will go crazy.

Hmmmm, strange. I wonder if I will snap out of this. I hope it's just temporary. I don't like feeling bleak. I miss my upbeat personality but I can't force myself to be one at the moment. Bummer...

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