09 March 2011

A Piece of Humble Pie

(Photo credit: webdonuts.com)
I think everywhere we go, there will be at one point in our lives, a brush with some individuals who think they are God’s greatest gift to humanity. I have been enduring the company of these people for so long now that I know my way around them. I have learned the art of filtering what I hear from these people when they start their “Oh-I’m-so-fabulous” mantra. The moment they open their mouths, I already know the various egotistical remarks to follow. So, I switch to “deaf” mode. Sometimes, I imagine holding a remote control with a mute button and press it so hard so I don’t hear a single word they say. It works!
That's the power of imagination.

I thought I was relieved of that experience when I left the Philippines. I am so surprised to know that there are more in this place than one can ever imagine. They are multiplying by the hundred. I have to practice the art of “ignoring” once again. There is no certain cure for conceited people. I am not sure whether it is genetic or a mind-set. Whatever it is, there is a way to make your life as pleasing as possible when you are in the presence of these mighty people. Here are some tips I have learned on how to deal with them.

1. Ignore them now and ignore them in the future.
Once you start listening to their “I’m-so-great-you-have-to-pay-attention-to-me” then you’re sucked in. Learn to ignore them from the very start. Excuse yourself from the conversation or fake a dash to the nearest comfort room. That works like a charm!

2. Do not initiate a conversation that will only give them a chance to boast about themselves.
I try not to ask how their day has been or I’ll regret ever opening my mouth. If simple pleasantries are hard to avoid, just nod your head when you pass each other along the corridor. If they start the conversation first, just give a quick answer and do not prolong. Your goal is to get away from the situation as fast as you can before they can get the chance to brag and tell their accomplishments from childhood to present.

3. Turn a deaf ear.
Say to yourself, “I’m not hearing a thing.” Repeat again and again and again…

4. Do not associate yourself with them.
It is easy to spot them, you just have to listen and then you’ll know. When you are in a party or no matter where the location is, pay close attention to the conversation. As soon as you hear the egotistical remarks, run away and never come back. Now, it is easy for you to not associate yourself with them because you know it already. Believe me, I know some who drives me nuts with their stories about themselves that I literally pry myself away from them. Last time I checked, communication was (and still is) a two-way street. Remember that.

5. Burst their bubbles.
Okay, this one is a bit tricky. I will not suggest you do this unless you are the brazen kind. Doing this will only invite more enemies and trouble for you especially if you pull this one-off in the office. However, if you want to put these egotistical maniacs to planet Pluto, then do so. Sometimes it pays to be bold than cringe and suffer in silence.

6. Lastly, bake them a “humble pie.”
In short, pray for them. Their being conceited may just be a defense mechanism to hide their insecurities. So they highlight the insignificant things to cover those up. Yes, pray for them. They may just be troubled deep inside and who is better to understand them but YOU.

If you don’t know how to deal with them, you’ll just find yourself frustrated and even angry. Don’t let them get into your nerves. They’re not worth the time, effort and emotion.


14 comments :

  1. Nice insights, my friend! Just to let you know I was here today!!! Have a good one!

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  2. Every bloggers and readers can relate to this article. Your insights are good but all of us have different ways to tackle the situations. Informative article indeed!

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  3. Egoistic people are everywhere and they really are a turn off. If I encounter people like that, I just do your no. 1 and 2 tips.

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  4. sometimes, we can't control what is going on with about surroundings.

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  5. LOL. Looks like you've had enough. I always have deaf ears but sometimes I can't help it but let them 'be proud of themselves'. ROFL!

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  6. I am glad I am not surrounded with those types, no stressor. Actually, we hardly have time to talk at work that whenever we get the chance we are just so excited to talk about our students and classroom practices
    but no time to talk about us. Glad you've developed a system to get out of the situation.

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    1. It was a bit of a challenge sis Betchai. I am a good listener but when it is too much and the communication is no longer two-way, I have to end it. I get saturated too. :)

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  7. I love the deaf mode sis lol, it's hard to ignore sometimes but if you know what is coming, you can definitely set yourself to a "you don't exist to me, I see and hear nothing" lol.

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    1. It's a skill I have probably mastered over the years sis Chubskulit. I've learned to "mute" and "filter" and at the same time, acknowledge their presence. I do understand that some people are just plain happy to share their accomplishments or their kids' achievements but doing it every single time you talk and never giving you the chance to speak up is plain annoying. I just ignore them altogether!

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  8. In other words--- deadma. From my own experience, after I've exhausted every possible diplomatic means and ignored them for as long as I can handle but to no avail - - - I'm know to do #5 . Yes, I burst their bubble and go all out hahaha. Ang hirap kayang magtiis.

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    1. I agree! They call me the Queen Bee ;) But, I do it with smile and grace to cushion the blow. LOL!

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  9. thank goodness I'm not around with those kind of people. That's why I'm very picky to whom I associate with.

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  10. Nice system you have there Sis Ria! I do believe you can last countless days with such kind of personality and dealing towards those kinds of people. I agree, there is not a cure for conceited people. I am not surrounded with some in my workplace but I do know a lot of them, relatives for that matter. I have developed mantra of just listening to them and ignoring them, too.Most of all, I do your last advice as well. It's the one that gives me the peace of mine that I needed. :)

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  11. I remember Windy telling me I am the Queen of all Diplomats, hahaha! I believe I have mustered that. Yong #3 kering- keri ko yan. Hahaha! I try to do all actually. In this rotten world, it's close to impossible that we couldn't meet people like them so I always expect to meet them each time. I am prepared all the time! Hahaha!

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